Why is polygamy illegal? That’s the question Wendy Kaminer’s asks in a recent article. Her answer:
[B]ecause the Supreme Court doesn’t like it. Over one hundred years ago, the Court held in Reynolds v. U.S. that polygamy was “an offence against society.” The Reynolds decision upheld the criminal conviction of a man accused of taking a second wife in the belief that he had a religious duty to practice polygamy, a duty he would violate at risk of damnation.
Then she argues why polygamy should be legal:
Nontheists who favor civil unions for everyone—taking the state out of the business of approving or disapproving religious matrimonial rites—should be especially supportive of the First Amendment right to engage in polygamous marriages sanctified by any faith. Whether or not polygamy should be legalized so that people in polygamous marriages enjoy equal rights and entitlements (like Social Security benefits), it should at least be decriminalized. Why should we care about other people’s private religious ceremonies? How dare we criminalize them?
I agree. If a man wants to marry two women, and the women agree, why should the government make it illegal? What business is it of theirs?
I don’t think polygamy is ideal, even though David and Solomon, two heroes of the Bible, certainly did. But I also don’t think it should be illegal. It’s not the government’s business to legislate morality unless it causes harm to others.
What do you think?
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26 Comments
polygamy, polyandry and polyamory should all be legal, and so should gay marriage.
If they love one another, or more than one another, why not?
One wife is more than enough, thanks.
@Luke: Yes, one is all I can handle, too. And certainly all my bank account can handle.
Ideally, if the government didn’t end up so involved in the disolution of marriages (divorce, custody, alimony, child support, abuse, etc) I’d say let everyone be and marry who they want. In our day and time, it’s a legal mess that I can’t imagine. I also think that currently a lot of plural marriages are forced or coerced.
@Amanda: When marriages are forced or coerced — with monogamy OR polygamy — it becomes the government’s business. That is not acceptable. Many monogamous marriages are forced or coerced, especially with foreign wives, but that doesn’t mean the government should make monogamy illegal.
As for the legal issues, perhaps that should be sorted out in the beginning (if X happens, this happens) or if it is always a mess, make them forfeit certain legal rights if they want to do it anyway.
I see nothing wrong with polygamy. My opinion is that if the people involved are consenting adults, as opposed to forced and underage marriages, so be it. In my society, cultural marriages, alongside civil and Christian marriages, are recognized by the state and allow a man to marry as many women as he would like (or can afford since he has to pay dowry). I know many happy polygamous families.I wonder why polygamous people in the West haven’t stood up for their rights?
In a society where those who think they are right push the view of marriage as a one-man, one-woman affair, you begin to question some the assumptions used to justify the discrimination of people with different views and lifestyles on marriage. Along with baptism names, opposition to polygamy is one other reason I’ve always felt that many of the values that Christianity promotes are just part of European culture, not something that Christ would necessarily require us to be/do. Cultural imperialism. If anything, Christianity evolved from Judaism which doesn’t seem to have issues with polygamy. Obviously my society has a lot of work to do when it comes to ending discrimination against gay people. I’m a Christian.
I’m against legalizing it, for the simple fact that polygamy seems, to me, to be a highly patriarchal institution that tends to exploit the women involved.
I’m confused as to what is actually being made illegal. Is it getting multiple marriage certificates/whatever signed and registered with the gov’t? Or is it just calling yourselves married?
@Ian: I think currently in the US, if you call yourself married to more than one woman, you are in danger of being arrested. I don’t think they issue marriage certificates to someone who is already married.
It’s probably more technical than that, but I’m not sure what exactly they would consider qualification that you’re a polygamist.
Hmm. It all seems rather vague and ripe for abuse to my ears. It would be interesting to see what some actual cases of people being prosecuted for polygamy looked like.
@Lost Left Coaster, does that mean you would be comfortable throwing in jail anyone who would like to call themselves married to more than one person? Or what would you think illegalizing polygamy entails?
LLC: Once it was, but so was monogamy. Women were owned, and promised to be obedient to their husbands.
As I noted in my first comment, if polygamy is legalised, polyandry (one woman, lots of men) and polyamory (just a whole lot of people of various genders all married up together) should be too
I agree. We have polygamy (and polyandry) happening unofficially anyways, but secondary wives (or husbands) are not granted any rights or benefits. In the case of the death of the spouse they are often left at the mercy of the official wife (or husband). Why not legalize it and protect everybody?
A great book on the subject is Peter McWilliams “Ain’t No One’s Business If I Do.” It’s an AWESOME book, hilarious, and water-tight argument for why anything and everything should be illegal if it involves consenting adults and does not harm anyone else’s person or property.
No matter how repulsive it might be to us, we should tolerate it as long as it meets those criteria.
I like the idea of multiple marriage. In theory it should result in a sound structure for families that can withstand the loss of one or more parents.
But the practise revolts me. The abused children of Waco and Bountiful are only the most visible points on that particular iceberg.
Most of the time it seems to be because these families are organized along religious lines. I wonder what an atheist polyandry would look like?
However, there’s another downside–Judas Priest … Can y’imagine a divorce between, say, three men and three women, with nine kids involved?
If nothing else, the expense of lawyers should mitigate against it.
Why would I want one more woman in my house who refuses me sex?
Just kidding…sort of.
I have long wondered how Christians can logically support such a law, but then I saw that I was thinking logically.
I’m not particularly keen on throwing anyone in jail for it, unless, obviously, in situations like the Texas case where the wives were underage and being sexually abused. But I see no need for society to issue marriage certificates between more than two people. People can co-habitate in any way they choose and live any lifestyle they choose, and no one has to be monogamous, they can have an open marriage, whatever they want. And of course I’m a huge supporter of same-sex marriage.
But honestly, historically, and around the world today, polygamy has been and is a very exploitative institution. Why are some of you making this sound like some kind of great progressive cause? Is there demand? Are there women out there just aching to be one of multiple wives for a single man? It seems to me that societies that still practice polygamy are the most patriarchal, and women are often coerced, at least by tradition, to join in such an institution; I would appreciate if someone could point me to evidence otherwise.
And by the way, I’m talking about polygamy, not polyandry, because polyandry is extremely rare, so to me it really doesn’t merit discussion. In the anthropological record, I am only aware of polyandry being widely practiced amongst upper-class Sherpas in Nepal. In the rest of the world, multiple spouses means multiple wives and one man. So that’s why I’m limiting my side of the discussion to that concept.
I suppose, were I to be honest about it, that finding that one special person I could marry the first time around was hellish enough. I mean look–it took me about twenty years.
I’d hate to think about having to compete with richer, better-looking people for the love of several women.
when the LDS church started the practice of polygamy they enforced laws that enabled women to have more freedom of choice; divorce laws were lenient enough that people from other states and territories came to Utah to obtain divorces, there were also inheritance laws that protected polygamist wives and their children. The institution as it was set up in Utah created an atmosphere which allowed women more freedom then their non-polygamous counterparts in the nineteenth century. That being said the Fundamentalist LDS communities that are around today are awful they promote child abuse, women’s subjugation, and if the stories told by women who escaped are true they also kick out little boys as soon as they reach puberty so the competition is limited. Women are cloistered and not allowed access to the outside “heathen” world and this is not alright. This is not polygamy it is institutionalized abuse. If polygamy was legal it would not change how these people lived, this lifestyle is cruel to women and children.
I think the practice of polygamy has been demonized by these people. I would never want to have a polygamous marriage but that does not mean that polygamous marriages can’t be practiced in a mutually respectable manner. Consenting ADULTS should not have to ask the government how to conduct their lives; as long as they are not hurting anyone else. Marriages whether they are polygamous or gay should be allowed. There would need to be new laws enacted to protect polygamous partners like inheritance laws and laws which made it illegal for one partner to secretly marry another partner. It would not harm society to make polygamy legal.
LLC: Just because, in societies without equality, an institution isn’t equal, doesn’t mean it would be the same in our society.
Are you really saying that if polyamorous marriages were introduced, women in our society would instantly become or be forced to be submissive and obedient?
@Daniel: Wanting to legalize polygamy now, are we? Looks like I should keep a closer tab on this blog of yours.
Dude, you’re busted!
I fully support the right of the individual to fall in love with as many people of whatever sex or sexes they happen to desire.
However, polygamy has some unfortunate side effects. When men can and do have several wives, the level of competition for available women goes up dramatically, and the inevitable result of a highly polygamous society is many unhappy unmarried men, with not the slightest chance of ever finding a wife, which results in young men who generally have an ax to grind and nothing to lose. There is a case to be made that polygamy in the middle east is a significant contributor to the suicide bomber mentality.
So polygamy for the individual is fine.. but on a large scale it has consequences, particularly a large pool of young males with no hope.
Aor: that’s why you have polyandry, too!
in a society where women have equal rights, such as our own, that problem goes away.
Yes
Many of us can and do love 2 – 3 – 4 – or even more.
My lovers have lovers of their own and we never meet.
We don’t own anything but a place in each others hearts.
Love is wonderful.
I’m late to the party, but I feel like I should comment on this. Like gay marriage, I don’t think this should be illegal. It’s not our business what other people want to do if it doesn’t harm anyone. But only on the condition that it’s not just men who can marry again, but also the women.
Though I can see where this can lead to massive headaches, tax and familial wise.
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