Comments on: Should polygamy be illegal?

By: DDM

DDM — Sat, 11 Apr 2009 02:37:56 +0000

I’m late to the party, but I feel like I should comment on this. Like gay marriage, I don’t think this should be illegal. It’s not our business what other people want to do if it doesn’t harm anyone. But only on the condition that it’s not just men who can marry again, but also the women.

Though I can see where this can lead to massive headaches, tax and familial wise.

By: nine

nine — Sun, 21 Sep 2008 23:20:43 +0000

Yes

Many of us can and do love 2 – 3 – 4 – or even more.

My lovers have lovers of their own and we never meet.

We don’t own anything but a place in each others hearts.

Love is wonderful.

By: wazza

wazza — Thu, 11 Sep 2008 09:30:28 +0000

Aor: that’s why you have polyandry, too!

in a society where women have equal rights, such as our own, that problem goes away.

By: Aor

Aor — Tue, 09 Sep 2008 16:54:11 +0000

I fully support the right of the individual to fall in love with as many people of whatever sex or sexes they happen to desire.

However, polygamy has some unfortunate side effects. When men can and do have several wives, the level of competition for available women goes up dramatically, and the inevitable result of a highly polygamous society is many unhappy unmarried men, with not the slightest chance of ever finding a wife, which results in young men who generally have an ax to grind and nothing to lose. There is a case to be made that polygamy in the middle east is a significant contributor to the suicide bomber mentality.

So polygamy for the individual is fine.. but on a large scale it has consequences, particularly a large pool of young males with no hope.

By: wazza

wazza — Mon, 01 Sep 2008 05:49:58 +0000

Dude, you’re busted!

By: Bethany Florien

Bethany Florien — Mon, 01 Sep 2008 02:45:20 +0000

@Daniel: Wanting to legalize polygamy now, are we? Looks like I should keep a closer tab on this blog of yours.

By: wazza

wazza — Sat, 30 Aug 2008 00:07:39 +0000

LLC: Just because, in societies without equality, an institution isn’t equal, doesn’t mean it would be the same in our society.

Are you really saying that if polyamorous marriages were introduced, women in our society would instantly become or be forced to be submissive and obedient?

By: Red

Red — Fri, 29 Aug 2008 19:12:02 +0000

when the LDS church started the practice of polygamy they enforced laws that enabled women to have more freedom of choice; divorce laws were lenient enough that people from other states and territories came to Utah to obtain divorces, there were also inheritance laws that protected polygamist wives and their children. The institution as it was set up in Utah created an atmosphere which allowed women more freedom then their non-polygamous counterparts in the nineteenth century. That being said the Fundamentalist LDS communities that are around today are awful they promote child abuse, women’s subjugation, and if the stories told by women who escaped are true they also kick out little boys as soon as they reach puberty so the competition is limited. Women are cloistered and not allowed access to the outside “heathen” world and this is not alright. This is not polygamy it is institutionalized abuse. If polygamy was legal it would not change how these people lived, this lifestyle is cruel to women and children.
I think the practice of polygamy has been demonized by these people. I would never want to have a polygamous marriage but that does not mean that polygamous marriages can’t be practiced in a mutually respectable manner. Consenting ADULTS should not have to ask the government how to conduct their lives; as long as they are not hurting anyone else. Marriages whether they are polygamous or gay should be allowed. There would need to be new laws enacted to protect polygamous partners like inheritance laws and laws which made it illegal for one partner to secretly marry another partner. It would not harm society to make polygamy legal.

By: Metro

Metro — Fri, 29 Aug 2008 15:47:19 +0000

I suppose, were I to be honest about it, that finding that one special person I could marry the first time around was hellish enough. I mean look–it took me about twenty years.

I’d hate to think about having to compete with richer, better-looking people for the love of several women.

By: Lost Left Coaster

Lost Left Coaster — Fri, 29 Aug 2008 14:35:37 +0000

And by the way, I’m talking about polygamy, not polyandry, because polyandry is extremely rare, so to me it really doesn’t merit discussion. In the anthropological record, I am only aware of polyandry being widely practiced amongst upper-class Sherpas in Nepal. In the rest of the world, multiple spouses means multiple wives and one man. So that’s why I’m limiting my side of the discussion to that concept.

By: Lost Left Coaster

Lost Left Coaster — Fri, 29 Aug 2008 14:26:57 +0000

I’m not particularly keen on throwing anyone in jail for it, unless, obviously, in situations like the Texas case where the wives were underage and being sexually abused. But I see no need for society to issue marriage certificates between more than two people. People can co-habitate in any way they choose and live any lifestyle they choose, and no one has to be monogamous, they can have an open marriage, whatever they want. And of course I’m a huge supporter of same-sex marriage.

But honestly, historically, and around the world today, polygamy has been and is a very exploitative institution. Why are some of you making this sound like some kind of great progressive cause? Is there demand? Are there women out there just aching to be one of multiple wives for a single man? It seems to me that societies that still practice polygamy are the most patriarchal, and women are often coerced, at least by tradition, to join in such an institution; I would appreciate if someone could point me to evidence otherwise.

By: bob

bob — Fri, 29 Aug 2008 14:14:39 +0000

Why would I want one more woman in my house who refuses me sex?

Just kidding…sort of.

I have long wondered how Christians can logically support such a law, but then I saw that I was thinking logically.

By: Best of the Blogosphere: Musings on Meaning

Best of the Blogosphere: Musings on Meaning — Fri, 29 Aug 2008 02:46:26 +0000

[...] up an interesting discussion on the role of government in our religious/secular personal lives. Read “Should polygamy be illegal”. [...]

By: Metro

Metro — Thu, 28 Aug 2008 23:13:39 +0000

I like the idea of multiple marriage. In theory it should result in a sound structure for families that can withstand the loss of one or more parents.

But the practise revolts me. The abused children of Waco and Bountiful are only the most visible points on that particular iceberg.

Most of the time it seems to be because these families are organized along religious lines. I wonder what an atheist polyandry would look like?

However, there’s another downside–Judas Priest … Can y’imagine a divorce between, say, three men and three women, with nine kids involved?

If nothing else, the expense of lawyers should mitigate against it.

By: Jim Etchison

Jim Etchison — Thu, 28 Aug 2008 20:47:23 +0000

A great book on the subject is Peter McWilliams “Ain’t No One’s Business If I Do.” It’s an AWESOME book, hilarious, and water-tight argument for why anything and everything should be illegal if it involves consenting adults and does not harm anyone else’s person or property.

No matter how repulsive it might be to us, we should tolerate it as long as it meets those criteria.