By Here’s George Carlin on swearing on the Bible:
“Yeah — I’ll tell you as much truth as the people who wrote that fucking Bible, how do you like that? Swearing on the Bible doesn’t mean anything, because Bible or no Bible, God or no God, if it suits their purposes, people are going to lie in court. The police do it all the time.”
It’s a stupid practice. People can tell the truth without superstitiously placing their hand on an ancient book full of lies — and it’s not going to keep anyone from lying in court, either. If people are going to lie, they’re going to lie.
Ironically, if it is for Christians, then they shouldn’t be swearing on the Bible either! Jesus made it clear his followers were not supposed to swear in any way:
Do not swear at all, either by heaven, for it is the throne of God, or by the earth, for it is his footstool, or by Jerusalem, for it is the city of the great King. And do not swear by your head, for you cannot make one hair white or black. [This was obviously before hair coloring products existed. Though it is difficult to make one single hair a different color...]
Let your word be “Yes, Yes’ or “No, No’; anything more than this comes from the evil one. (Matt. 5:34-37, NRSV)
It means nothing to non-Christians, and Christians are forbidden to do it.
So why are we still doing it?
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32 Comments
I’ve always wondered what happens when a devout Muslim or someone similar refuses to do that.
There’s a procedure for that. Generally, they are asked to swear without the bible, and without saying “so help me god”, though muslims do worship the same god.
I’ve always wondered if you could request a book to swear on… Maybe the God Delusion or On The Origin of Species.
I sure wonder the same thing! I find it vaguely offensive. BIG problem: I think it violates separation of church and state.
In Ontario, we can choose to swear on one of several (un)holy books, or to be affirmed. When I was called for jury duty last year, about 100 of us were selected by lottery to be questioned and then accepted or rejected. I was the only one who chose to be affirmed rather than to swear.
It’s sad when you think about it.
Someone should make a case to swear on The Gospel of The Flying Spaghetti Monster. That would definitely be something to see…
How about on a DVD of Star Wars, for those who claim Jedi as their religion?
“It means nothing to non-Christians, and Christians are forbidden to do it.
So why are we still doing it?”
I know, I know! Because Christians never READ their Bibles!
Well, they do read it… but comply only selectively.
Even when I was a Christian I refused to swear on the bible. It actually says not to swear on it, so… that part’s funny.
Surely this isn’t a big deal in America, is it? I find it hard to believe you’d be in legal hot water for not swearing on the bible. But then, I find a lot of things about America hard to believe.
Interesting,
At a Mennonite church I attended, swearing on the Bible was frown upon. They thought the Bible was degraded by being used in the court system. When I became a Canadian citizen I was given the choice to swear on a holy book or to affirm. I affirmed.
Right! That was the reason. The reason was that they the Bible says not to swear or something. I’ve forgotten (good signs of recovery from brainwashing).
So why are we still doing it?
For the same reason people still practice religions based on primitive texts. Most people are stupid and refuse to question anything.
“I promise to tell as much truth as the people who wrote it,” is comedy gold.
lol
lawmen could say “I promise to be as much logic and coherent in my speech as this book is”
I love George Carlin, and I was very fortunate to see his last tour before he passed away. All his life George pointed out the endless foolish things we do “that are just fuckin stupid”. I got hooked on “Class Clown” in the early 70’s ( “seven dirty words” and drug oriented society”), but never got to actually see him until 2007. I brought two of my children(one was cross country), and my grandchild in utero.
Why do we still do it, well as George says, “people are stupid, there just fuckin loopy.”
I personally think it’s herd mentality. Someone told you to, so you do. As my mother always said to me when I did something stupid, “Well if they told you to jump off the Brooklyn bridge, would ya?”
I too had jury duty last year. To honor my selection I wore a long sleeved earth toned tye dye for the jury selection process. Needless to say I was not selected. Even so I won’t swear on the bible.
I am fortunate to work in the state of Washington and everytime I’ve had to appear in court or obtain a signature from a judge on a warrant there has never been a bible involved. They do still ask us to raise our right hand, though. One thing at a time I guess.
I found this very surprising. Then again, considering the fact that Christians commonly contradict the Bible in their day-to-day lives, it shouldn’t be surprising, but you’d think something that clear would be something everyone got down pat.
In other, more obnoxious news, I wonder if you could swear to the FSM.
What if you’re a Jedi? Could you swear on any of the Star Wars movies?
Beat me to it :-) Maybe it would have to be a complete boxed set. It’s be incomplete if you only swore by the original 3 – it’d be like only swearing by the New Testament.
Wait a minute…there’s lots of Christians who live that way, even if they swear on, by or at a full Bible…
Do US courts actually use a Bible anymore, or is that only a cinematic convention?
I don’t know why we still swear on a bible. But, I know that there are a lot of poeple out there that fear change. FEAR, it’s pumped into our socity by the media, in bucket loads. Think back, all the way, as far as you can. I bet you can go back and remember the different things that we were to fear. Right now, it’s scary terrorists. And like Goerge Carlin said, Wikipedia Japenese Americans 1942. FEAR.
one word: tradition.
i don’t know, or care, why it was started, but it’s just one of those things that we carry on because we don’t know any other way to do it.
On a slightly unrelated topic, where does it come from that Christians should ‘disregard’ the OT?
Is this actually specified in the NT by Jesus or something?
You should follow the OT according to Genesis 17:19, Exodus 12:14, 12:17, 12:24, Leviticus 23:14, 23:21, 23:31, Deuteronomy 4:8-9, 7:9, 11:1, 11:26-28, 1 Chronicles 16:15, Psalm 119:151-152, 119:160, Malachi 4:4, Matthew 5:18-19 (which is the most famous one, and reputedly spoken by Jesus), and Luke 16:17.
You should disregard the OT according to Luke 16:16, Romans 6:14, 7:4, 7:6, 10:4, 2 Corinthians 3:14, Galatians 3:13, 3:24-25, 5:18, Ephesians 2:15, and Colossians 2:14.
Source.
I love biblical contradictions.
I think you mean OT except for the Matthew, and all the ones to disregard are NT… which, of course, were almost entirely written by Paul…
sorry… should have read more…
but it’s interesting that it’s almost entirely OT in favour of following the OT, whereas it is entirely NT that tells you to disregard it in favour of the words of Paul.
People are impressed by ritual, for some reason. It’s reasonable to speculate that some people who swear (on the bible or anything else) might be slightly more likely to tell the truth (or to include truths they might not otherwise have done) in situations where it’s not going to cost them much either way, but it seems unlikely that it has ever changed anyone’s mind about whether they are going to lie or not.
It stikes me that this is something that could be tested. Why don’t we do that? Probably a mixture of laziness and poor cost/benefit ratio. Would it really be worth all the trouble of testing whether swearing is effective and the inevitable outcry if it’s found to be ineffective and removed from the procedure?
following a ritual shows commitment to social norms… if following this ritual is a social norm, and telling the truth in court is a social norm…
People tend to forget that cultural norms aren’t necessarily all bound up in one self-supporting package
Awesome my friend – you can never go wrong starting your day with a nice dose of George Carlin.
I didn’t see anyone answer the question.
In the US do they give you a choice between different holy books or to simply affirm?
Here in Canada I was presented with a whole stack of different books to choose from and was allowed to affirm.
Courts here are certainly are different than the US ones portrayed in the media. You have to bow as you enter and leave the room. Prosecutors and defence attorneys refer to each other as my friend.
The essentials are the same though. If you come here and are accused of a something I’m certain you’ll get a fair trial.
I refused to swear on a bible when I was called to testify. I am an active member of my religious organization, but II am not a Christian. I don’t believe that, whether I am religious, or an atheist, a Christian, or something else, makes any difference–it was offensive to me to ask me to swear on the Christian bible. I told the Judge that I would not swear on that bible, because it “was not my bible”, Incidentally, my religion also teaches not to swear (“Thou Shalt not take the Lord’s name in vain”), right from the Big Ten.
After some intial confusion, the judge agreed that I could recite that my testimony would be subject to the penalties of perjury. That is the only right result, regardless of your religion. If you lie and are caught, you face big prison time. (Unless you are the President of the US.) If the fear of prison doesn’t keep you from lying, then swearing in any form, whether or not on a bible, is going to be meaningless.
I would think that the First Amendment would make this all obvious, but the Supreme Court is still a couple of hundred years behind the rest of us. It still upholds Blue Laws, notwithstanding their obvious religious nature (enforcing a Christian sabbath on everyone). And when I was admitted to practice before the Supreme Court many years ago, my certificate of admission recited that I was being admitted “in the Year of Our Lord 1967″ Notwithstanding my vociferous complaint that it was “MY” lord, the Court clerk would not delete that language from the certificate.
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[...] I’ve never claimed to truly understand the Bible for the tangled web of contradiction that it is, but then again, since I’m not religious, no one has ever expected me to. However, I’ve actually devoted time to reading it and have discovered things that even most people I know who do profess to believe in God don’t know. Swearing on the Bible always seemed stupid to me, as besides the fact that it’s a clear violation of the separation of Church and State, people who feel the need to lie will do so anyway. Daniel Florien of Unreasonable Faith has made a surprising observation, though: Jesus didn’t want you to, either! [...]