Here is one person’s 1-sentence summary of their thoughts on church:
After calculating that I wasted 6500 hours in church the first 25 years of my life, I vowed to spend 6500 hours doing volunteer work that would actually make a difference in the world.
Sounds like a good plan to me.
What’s your 1-sentence thought on church?
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83 Comments
I’m glad I’m not weak-minded or empty enough to have to fill my life with the lies that the preachers spout.
It would be more interesting if they just came up with some new stories once in a while.
At least the 7th Day Adventists I dealt with were good cooks.
Ouch ! Where would blogging fall?
I don’t have a one-sentence opinion on church, but I do have a one-sentence opinion on religion: “Religion would be a wonderful thing if there were never ANY humans involved.”
No religions since the beginning of humanity would qualify…
I never had to endure church, but it sure sounds awful.
I second this one.
Wouldn’t be seen dead in one. Managed to avoid them so far.
Why don’t they donate all of their money to the less fortunate, or is running faith like a business too much fun?
Amen!
Where people who don’t know how to sing congregate to celebrate a corpse.
haha – very funny & TRUE. I live across the street from a babtist church and only one thing comes to mind when I hear the singing — noise pollution!
I’m embarrassed that I went through a church phase in junior high, & I hope that my future children never ask to see what it’s like because I wouldn’t want to see others attempt to brainwash them into their cult.
Been there, done that, now it’s over.
Church is the worst aspects of high school dragged on through adulthood.
lol – sad but true
Church: I thought about it, laughed about it and forgot about it.
The church I went to led me to doubt the existence of the God they said was real.
You nailed it. When my cousins who still attend Church of Christ try to talk God, I remind them that their church taught me the joys of mocking religion.
RAmen!
So, arrakis, tell us about the spice…
The spice must flow.
LOL!
Churches are good for weddings and funerals – they are good at putting on a show – the rest of the time you’d be better off sleeping.
“If only they practiced what they preached.”
“No religion should be the only religion.”
“Faith is for the weak and religion makes them weaker.”
“God should shove a steeple up his ass.”
Oops … you said one. One sentence thoughts on church/religion are just like potato chips. You can never have just one. @:-D
“Church” was never intended as an external “event” but an interior life in the fellowship of the spirit. For He is Spirit and He is within as we, our bodies are the intended “temple”, ie church where He dwells.
The truth (the end, the highest potential) of every man is Christ perfected IN him. George Macdonald.
Christ IN you, the mystery of the ages. Col 1:27
(sorry but that’s a’bout as close to a one sentence answer I can muster on such a wonderful, beautiful topic as this). Greetings to all of you today.
Hi! :) Hope you are well.
Church is where I was psychologically raped for the first 20 years or so of my life.
Nice! Great sentence. Sorry for your pain.
I’m feeling fantastic these days, thanks. Ain’t no “Christ-shaped hole” in this heart, yo.
It was a fucking waste of time and a perfect way to ruin a weekend.
I’m going to “go John Galt” here and suggest you spend those 6500 bettering yourself or achieving some personally worthwhile goal (inventing something, getting an advanced degree, etc…). While volunteering and charity are admirable, one has value as an individual, not simply as a means to other’s ends.
Who is John Galt?
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/John_Galt
Maybe?
That sound was the joke going over your head.
Sorry, not a literary nerd.
I’ll try not to be so helpful next time. I’ll just stick to picking fights and mocking people.
The second sentence of that article poses the same question. :)
You read the articles? Shit, man I just look at the pictures.
By accompanying my spouse to church church I’ve calculated that there are 6,000 bricks in the wall behind the altar, the power consumption of the ceiling lights is about 9kW-hr per service and many other diverting facts.
I had some of the most peaceful naps of my life during Wednesday night meetings at the Christian Science Church.
Church: a highly refined ritualistic practice and communal brainwashing to exhort praise and worship upon the Sun.
And to lay heavy emotional blackmail on the Believers.
Church: an exercise in passivity.
Church: an easy way to make money and get a nice power trip! Church: an easy way for older generations to impose their outdated “morals”.
Church: We will control your mind with JEEZUZ RAYZ!
My experience of church has been thus: wonderful people, good coffee, bizarre superstitions.
That’s it!
The people I met in churches weren’t any different than people I met anywhere else. They were normal in every respect except for their obsession with self-loathing and sucking up to the big sky bully. Oh, and I never found a good cup of coffee in a church. If I had, I might have been a christian for a little longer.
in my quest for god I found out 3 things:
1)Nuns are sadistic
2)Preachers will never really answer your questions
3)Evangelists at revivals like teenage girls
Nice architecture.
I browsed the site and found this little gem in less than 2 minutes:
MHM:
My little cousin asked, “If Jesus was human, does that mean he farted?”
I LOLed. ^_^ If I had heard this question, I’d say, “Why yes Timmy, we know that he did. What we don’t know is if he tried to light it on fire or not.”
That was a given – the fire of the “holy spirit”
Ah, never thought of that. Good one!
Church the one place you can hate and call it love.
well as long as you say “bless his heart” at the end of your put-downs, god accepts it as sympathy.
“Obviously Mary’s weight loss surgery didn’t work; she’s still as big as a cow- bless her heart.”
See?
I’ve been to church no more than 20 times: 6 weddings, 2 wedding rehearsals, 3 baptisms (concurrent), 1 first holy communion, 2 Xmas eve masses, 1 Easter mass, 1 regular mass with my cousin when I was 12, possibly a christening when I was 11, 2 separate visits inside the St. Patrick’s Cathedral in NYC, and once to see all the cool stuff we were going to tear carefully out of a church in Pennsylvania and resell in a store where I worked that sold that kind of shit. I never did get to go back to that church (the new one hadn’t been built yet), but we were there demolishing the insides of the rectory first. If you are renovating your old house and need some authentic period fancy hinges or big sturdy wooden doors or hundreds of feet of identically milled molding, it might be from a church or rectory.
Church was a great place to check out hot repressed chicks.
Now you mention it, my Mother always used to say, “Why don’t you go to church and meet a nice girl?” Please put the stress on “Girl”!
What an unforgivable waste of art and architecture.
I pretty much hated church (and Sunday mornings) the whole time I was a christian (even when in ministry). One of the best things about not believing any more is not having to go to church and having my Sunday mornings doing something FUN!!!
I realized I needed to question the values of church messages and their guilt-evoking symbolism when I took my son into a Catholic church (his first) with a large crucifix, suffering Jesus attached, and he, a creeped-out ten-year-old, simply asked in a horrified tone, “Why is he hanging there?” Why, indeed.
Raised Catholic, I had carried a lot of guilt for terrible things done to me as a child and the shame of “confession”; I am glad he doesn’t have to bear that burden and is now a free-thinking college student.
I am SO grateful that I was raised by atheists and have only had to waste time in church for family stuff.
The entire goal behind the weekly appearance is to ensure you stay as ignorant as the week before.
Hi reck! :) how you been?
When the first thief met the first fool, the first priest was born.
Don’t.
Figured out how to hide boners when having to stand in large groups of prudes; also looked at a lot of butts.
Ha ha, so true!
In my junior high and high school years, I always used to come up with the best sexual fantasies while zoning out to the sermon…
The church near me is actually a public lunatic asylum
Church: your religion has a guy on a two by four, mine has porn, lolcats and lasers, beat that
Your religion is 4chan?
Reality is exciting enough.
A very poignant, relevant criticism. Unfortunately, I think this is probably an very accurate description for a large percentage of churches.
1 sentence…hmm…hows this….
“Church: not a cure for this hangover” lol
Church: The place parents sends their daughters to meet/socialize with nice church boys only to find that you get man handled by male church elders and end up hating god forever for not protecting them from such horrible people.
Wait, which am I supposed to be worshiping: the god, the church, or the preacher?
It still hurts that I was lied to for all those years.
Church: What the f*ck?
That’s 1000 hours I could’ve been using to get better at Mega Man.
If I could have back all the friends I alienated through my faith I would find a true wealth in this world.
what kind of crap church you are going ? go to one that is active in good works!
On the church:
“If god is all-knowing, then why do I have to pray? Dosent he know what I want and need? Wont he take care of me? Dosent he love everyone, if they pray or not?”