by Lorette C. Luzajic
Part 19 of the Pillars of Faith series
Blame it on “The Man”
Tony Alamo, 74, is convinced that a demon possessed FBI and the pope are behind the plot to put him in prison, but this defense didn’t exactly impress the judge who sentenced him to nearly two centuries of hard time.
Despite vivid descriptions of nonstop pederasty, mind control, dehumanizing, threats, deprivation, and violence inside the cult of Tony Alamo Christian Ministries, Tony claims his victims were paid off by the FBI or the Roman “whore of Babylon.” After wrestling with the law for 4 decades, he was put away last week for marrying a bevy of 8 year old girls.
The cult leader claims to be the “strongest fundamentalist Christian” in the world, and points out that all of the prophets were polygamous with young wives. God told him to marry them. But at the same time he denies it all and says evil, corrupt cops made it all up.
Who is this Tony Alamo? He has churches all over the world, with followers (“Alamos”) worshipping him as a “holy man of God” and prophet. A closer look at this chosen one reveals one of the weirdest and most terrifying cult leaders of all time.
Hearing the Voice of God
Pullquote: Using beatings, brainwashing, starvation, deprivation, sex, and other hallmarks of cult tactics, Tony managed to maintain a hive of worker bees, and a constant supply of children with whom God told him to sleep.
A Jew of Romanian ancestry, he was born Bernie Hoffman. But Italian crooners were all the rage, so he chose the name Tony Alamo with hopes of making it in singing. One day, while meeting with some music biz execs, he had what some would call a psychotic break. “Suddenly my ears went completely deaf. I could not hear any noise from the crowd in the room… I heard a voice… all around me…The voice said, “I AM THE LORD THY GOD. TELL THE PEOPLE IN THIS ROOM THAT JESUS CHRIST IS COMING BACK TO EARTH, OR THOU SHALT SURELY DIE.”
It was not the first time. He’d been hearing and seeing things since childhood. (Not long after this vision, he saw hundreds of flying saucers.) He went to tell his friend Susan about hearing God. Susan was a Christian Jew so Tony knew she would relate. To make a long story short, they got married, and went into the ministry, preaching to hippies in the ‘60s. They also sold rhinestone jackets, a fitting gig for a preacher who then looked like Disco Stu.
Behind the scenes things were getting freaky. Inside compounds, Alamos who dedicated their life to Tony were increasingly cut off from the outside, and trained to believe that everyone else but them worshipped Satan. Using beatings, brainwashing, starvation, deprivation, sex, and other hallmarks of cult tactics, Tony managed to maintain a hive of worker bees, and a constant supply of children with whom God told him to sleep. Those who tried to even use a phone without permission, were beaten half to death.
One ex-Alamo reported in Los Angeles’ Press Argus, “The living conditions were disgusting. We slept body to body in sleeping bags on the floor… The bathroom conditions were worse. The toilets were always full because we were told that if we flushed them, the leaching field wouldn’t hold it all. So about every two or three days they were flushed … water was always cold. I took a shower about once a week.”
It Ain’t Over ‘til It’s Over
Pullquote: Tony told his people that his wife was going to be resurrected. 24 hour prayer around her corpse was everyday life for six months.
It gets even weirder. Susan died in 1982 of cancer, and Tony told his people that she was going to be resurrected. 24 hour prayer around her corpse was everyday life for six months. Eventually, the law ordered her coffin sealed, but the Alamos still kept vigil at her mountaintop casket. It was more than a decade before Susan’s family was able to locate and procure her body for burial.
Tony was outspoken about government conspiracies against him. He was very paranoid, but the reality was that the FBI was indeed following him. After all, he committed frauds and tax evasions of nearly 20 million dollars. Now Tony claims he is just another persecuted follower of Christ, imprisoned for the gospel.
He says the government raided and kidnapped the cult children. The judge “ordered that all the Christian children of my church should be taken from their parents and be adopted out to homosexuals, lesbians, child molesters, and numerous other wicked and satanic, obnoxious people.” This same government brainwashed the victims, too. “Deprogramming is a nice word for hypnosis, brainwashing, mind-control, voodoo, black magic. Their testimony is not to be believed because it is not true, and they are not in their right mind. They are under a hateful spell of witchcraft.”
He says he will continue to shepherd his flock from behind bars.
Matt: I find it very interesting that there are so many people out there with such sad lives as to sit... 
Tyrrlin: Wow… I’d like to buy apostrophes for most of those commenters. Apparently belief in a... 
Mathurine: I’m not so sure that they wouldn’t have. The father in the case is... 
JonJon: I agree. 
Siberia: That’s a question I always ask myself, though in other contexts, would I still be me if I’d... 
Mark Mukasa: I love the Paine pun. xD Awesome article. 
mikespeir: Amen, and amen. 
nomad: “Which is really unexpected and fascinating, when you think about it.” And don’t forget... 
13 Comments
Good grief.
To put it mildly!
“Their testimony is not to be believed because it is not true (…)”
Can’t argue that.
“Susan was a Christian Jew”
*facepalm*
No such thing exists.
And is it just me, or does this Alamo guy display classic signs of schizophrenia?
I think there is a sect who identify themselves as Jews who believe in the divinity of Christ. I supposed Jesus himself (if he existed) would count as one!
Since “christian” means “follow of Christ”, Jesus could only be a christian if he spent all day walking in circles.
“Christian Jew” refers to someone ethnically Jewish who converted to christianity.
That would be funny as hell to watch if it became a Christian tradition though! Hey, maybe dogs are obeying Christ’s teachings when they chase their own tails :D
I believe that they tend to think of themselves as Messianic Jews.
Most orthodox Jews believe that such people are not Jewish, as believing that Jesus is not the Jewish messiah is a significant part of their doctrine; just as many Christians will not accept someone who thinks that Jesus was not the Son of God as a Christian.
Another interpretation, of course, is that she was ethnically Jewish, but followed the Christian religion.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Messianic_Judaism
No such thing exists.
*facepalm*
As noted above, yes, there are Messianic Jews all over the world. Here’s a group that one of my seminary friends is affiliated with; he’s a practicing Jew and also a Christian: http://www.jews-for-jesus.org/
These people aren’t just “ethically” Jewish; they are religiously and culturally Jewish as well. They understand Jesus to be their Jewish Messiah.
Who would give up their 8-yr-old daughter to marry an old dude? How are people so dumb? Literally, I just don’t understand it.
You’re talking about people who find it easier to believe that God impregnated a virgin than to believe that a teenaged girl had a bit of pre-marital rumpy-pumpy. Are you really so shocked?
If Tony Alamo lived in an early time, he would have millions of followers today, like Mohammed or Joseph Smith. If Mohammed or Joseph Smith lived in today’s modern world, both would probably be in prison.
Man, this is the first I heard, since last year or early this year when he was first arrested. I was occasionally wondering when I would hear more (he was, like, not a high priority). So it’s good news this time.
I remember some kids bringing a tract and preaching at my sisters and me in Orange County at the beach, for chrissake, when we were drying off from swimming. It stands out in my memory because of his weird (to me) name, and the incredibly simplistic tract, with simple drawings of the “good” person putting a little cross on the throne instead of themselves. They get joiners this way??
Of course a few decades ago I was unaware of the sleazy nature of so many famous evangelists, heh.